I just discovered the 'Silent To-Do List' — and my cleaning has changed forever

Have you ever wondered why having clutter around you can feel so overwhelming? I always thought having belongings would come with a sense of achievement, success and homeliness. But, for me, too much clutter spells chaos.

Even when I'm thinking about a mess I need to sort, I get a sense of dread and overwhelming stress – and then I just put it off longer and longer.

But recently, I learnt about the 'silent to-do list' and suddenly my emotions around cleaning and tidying have become a lot easier to understand – and the items around my home a lot easier to deal with.

The concept was introduced by minimalist expert Fumio Sasaki in his book, 'Goodbye, Things'. And before I go any further, I feel like it's important to tell you that I'm not a minimalist. Far from it. But, you don't have to be for this to resonate with you.

I like the idea of living with less stuff, but at the end of the day, I have two small kids and I try to embrace the mess around my home as core memories rather than tidying it away in shame.

Everyone is different, but minimalist or not, this decluttering concept presents a rare opportunity to feel on top of your chores. Here's how it works.

What is the 'silent to-do list'?

As mentioned, the concept of the 'silent to-do list' comes from Sasaki's book in which he explains that all the items in our home are actually sending us silent messages, constantly.

They're asking us to clean them, tidy them, organize them, return them, use them, remember them, don't waste them and the list goes on.

It feels endless. Your clothes are asking you to wear them while at the same time your books are pleading with you to read them.

No surprise then, really, that we can feel constantly overwhelmed. As Sasaki goes on to explain, this list is bringing negative energy into your home without you even realizing it.

To eliminate your personal 'silent to-do list', you need to look at the items around your home and consider what they're asking of you and either you do these things, or you get rid of/donate those items.

Dirty washing asking to be put away? Do it. Box of random paperwork that's accumulated over years? Sort it, shred it, organize it.

And, the biggest task of all in dealing with your 'silent to-do list' is to eliminate items from it altogether. Ultimately, the less stuff you have, the less silent questions being asked of you.

Addressing my 'silent to-do list'

I talk a lot about decluttering. From the '90/90 rule' to using the KonMari method, I've tried different ways to tidy my home and some of them fit quite well with each other or can be used entirely alone.

And while Marie Kondo left me asking myself whether various items around my home were sparking joy for me, I found myself staring at them for a while, unsure, and then reticent.

So, when I tried addressing my 'silent to-do list', I quickly realized I had been gifted an objective of purposeful decluttering.

I've always written physical to-do lists (you should see the Notes app on my phone), but it's also always felt endless. Even when I'm done, there's still that overwhelm and sense of dread.

Learning about the 'silent to-do list' has helped me shift my mindset to what is actually reasonably achieved if I think about how so many items in my home are demanding my attention.

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It had got to a point where I felt an almost negative energy off items that clearly needed to be dealt with, whether that was cleaning them up or simply putting them away.

So, I walked around my home and dealt with a lot of items that have been waiting for me to answer their demands. First by thinking of what they want from me and then addressing it.

From sorting through my closet to tackling that drawer full of random junk, I have less stuff now, sure, but I also have intentional items that I've fulfilled their purpose.

My favorite decluttering and cleaning methods are the ones that change my entire mindset and this one seems to have had the deepest impact.

More from Tom's Guide

• 'The poop rule' is trending — here's why this gross decluttering hack actually works
• I finally tried the 'House Hushing' method to declutter my kitchen — here's what happened
• 7 ways to declutter your kitchen like a minimalist