3 Things the iPhone XS Really Needs for Me to Buy

What you see here is my current phone. It’s an iPhone 6. Look at that poor little bastard.

The back is not much better: the camera doesn’t have its protective glass, which makes all videos look like a JJ Abrams movie. It’s been dying for eight months now and still, I’m not getting the iPhone XS.

My disintegrating glass sandwich of an iPhone 6. Credit: Jesus Diaz

(Image credit: My disintegrating glass sandwich of an iPhone 6. Credit: Jesus Diaz)

I used and loved the original iPhone, which then-Gizmodo EIC’s Brian Lam bought for me the day of its launch. I wrote countless articles praising its virtues, back when most of its current fanboys were in high school and most industry experts dismissed it.

I was admiring the iPhone 4 design — still Apple’s best ever — before 99.99 percent of the people in the world. And I have had every single Apple iPhone until the iPhone 6. Every year since I bought this moribund beast, I have considered buying a new one. I ended saying no. This was good enough.

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Then the iPhone X came — supposedsely “The Future Of Phones” with a bezelless screen that turned out to be a screen with thick bezels and a notch. The iPhone X was a sham, so I passed. And the iPhone XS is the same sham, but bigger.

So what would have made me give Apple $1,000 to swap my disintegrating glass sandwich for a iPhone XS?

Death to the notch!

I just can’t say it enough. No matter what Apple said in the iPhone X introduction, the notch happened because of Face ID — and Face ID happened because Apple couldn’t have a reliable Touch ID device that worked under the screen.

Touch ID is a technology that works great. Sure, it can be tricked and it can fail —just like Face ID can be tricked and fail — but I find impossible to believe that an honest designer like Jony Ive would so blatantly go against Dieter Rams’s 10 design principles if he and his team have had a reliable Touch ID under the screen at their disposal.

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Nowadays, the iPhone XS could have had Touch ID, like the Vivo Nex S, and eliminate the notch. And if Apple wants to keep the depth cameras to allow for dumb Animojis and AI-beautified selfies, there are elegant, seamless solutions for this too — like the sliding screen implemented in the Oppo Find X or the Xiaomi Mix Mi3.

So yes, give me a true bezel less screen without notches or chins and I will start thinking about the XS.

A big battery that really lasts me a day

The new iPhone XS is supposed to have good battery life thanks, to a new 7nm manufacturing process that will make its A12 chip 40 percent more power efficient than the previous generation. This is great news — until you read about its battery.

According to respected Apple analyst Ming-Chi Kuo, the new 6.5-inch iPhone X will use a 3,300 mAh to 3,400 mAh battery (needed to power it gigantic screen), and the  the 5.8-inch model will have a 2700 mAh to 2800 mAh pack. This is ridiculous, especially considering that the current iPhone X’s has a 5.8-inch screen and a. 2,716mAh battery.

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Why is Apple including such tiny batteries in their iPhones? I’m not even asking for a 4,000mAh, like the $300 Pocophone F1. Sure, a 4,000mAh battery will probably make the iPhone X last an entire day of heavy usage, something that most users will kill for. But a 3,500mAh on the 5.8-inch model perhaps? 3,200mAh? That would have been enough for me. Add that and you almost get me. I’m at 90 percent YES! now.

A true new design

The iPhone 6 was the last Apple phone to implement a new aesthetic. Rounded corners, rounded edges — a thin soap bar.

That was in 2014. Four years ago, people.

When is Apple going to change again the iPhone design language? Especially when, right now, almost every single damn phone looks the same, What’s Apple waiting for to turn the world on its heels at the sight of a new beautiful object worthy of getting into a MoMA exhibit?

When is it going to return to the elegant principles that defined the quasi-perfect iPhone 4? I want Apple to surprise me again, not be conservative. I want them to invest in new materials to make the iPhone prettier and more durable, without forcing everyone to buy a horrible case.

So yeah, there. No notch, battery life, and a new beautiful design. That will get me to buy an iPhone XS. But alas, looking at the rumors, it seems like I will have to get a Xiaomi Mix Mi3 when this piece of crap iPhone 6 dies anytime now.

Jesus Diaz

Jesus Diaz founded the new Sploid for Gawker Media after seven years working at Gizmodo, where he helmed the lost-in-a-bar iPhone 4 story and wrote old angry man rants, among other things. He's a creative director, screenwriter, and producer at The Magic Sauce, and currently writes for Fast Company and Tom's Guide.