1: No
2: Assuming you mean an editor or IDE, that would be highly specific to your personal tastes
3: It would depend on the language, but as a general rule, O'Reilly Publishing makes some of the technical books around, and plenty of people recommend them sight unseen
I would suggest taking a look at a number of different languages that are out there, and then picking one to get started with. So you might want to look at some of the major players in the programming world today: C, C++, Java, Perl, Python, Ruby, and JavaScript. I might suggest Perl, Python, or Ruby as a first language, then you can branch out into some of the others. Just make sure to learn multiple languages, because the idea is to learn the how of programming. Once you understand programming as a concept, it should be fairly trivial for you to learn the syntax of a new language and get started. While different languages may structure things like loops or object oriented programming differently, the basic underpinnings are the same regardless of language. So just don't fall into the trap that Cobol programmers found themselves in when the world passed them by.